Women love a man who takes control. Then there’s the relentlessly considerate man who sees no need to control her at all. Every woman deeply appreciates how rare and special of a find this enlightened new age is, a who man places such a high importance on pleasing her that he makes sure never to impose himself by assuming he understands her needs without first asking what she actually wants. Every woman hears how this male sensitivity is highly treasured by other women, which is why she’ll be so conflicted when she realizes she absolutely detests a man for exactly the same quality. ...Women often complain that they leave subtle clues about their interest, and men misread them. This is surely true, as research shows that women themselves do recognize whether they are interested in a man. For example, one study said:
Women will openly admit they don’t always want to be asked what they’d like before a man acts because it quickly gets old and makes a man appear to be a child seeking permission. But at the same time women get very angry or hurt when they feel men haven’t asked about and listened to their needs. No wonder women are accused of wanting men to read their minds. It’s the only reasonable conclusion to arrive at about someone who by their own admission makes a habit of arguing for you to do something that they don’t actually want, because they won’t tell you what it is they do want you to do.
A common finding in psychophysiological research is that correlations between sexual feelings and genital responses are lower in women than in men. Measurement issues, anatomical differences, factors influencing self-report, and the role of attention have all been considered but do not seem sufficient to explain this gender difference. Providing women with feedback about their genital response, or asking them to focus on genital sensations, does not seem to increase response concordance, suggesting that women are less accurate in detecting genital responses.Another said:
However, clinical observations and laboratory studies have often pointed to a desynchrony in subjective and physiological sexual arousal in women, but not in menThis seems completely bizarre to me. It is one of many male-female differences that I would have liked to have learned when I was younger. It is more politically correct to deny these differences, so you have to find them on your own.